Do's and Don'ts of Hospital Visits

I discovered this on Babycenter.com and thought it was interesting/entertaining. For the most part, I can imagine this is good advice. Never having been there before, I don't know if all of it will apply to us - I guess we'll find out :)

While mom and baby are at the Hospital-


1. Don't "drop by" the hospital. It doesn't matter who you are. This is not a "drop in" event.

Do wait to be invited. Don't get all butt hurt if the new parents would rather have you visit at home.

2. Don't put anything on the new parent's facebook wall. The new parents may not want 200 of their friends, relatives and people they haven't spoken to since high school knowing that the new mom had an epidural, or a c section, or that the baby is in the NICU. Give the parents a chance to announce the arrival of their baby.

Do send a private message congratulating the new parents and sending well wishes.

3. Do not take it upon yourself to invite anyone else to the hospital. If you are invited to the hospital, remember that only YOU were invited. If the new mom invites Sally to the hospital, this means that Sally is to come to the hospital unless stated otherwise. Sally is not to bring her 3 year old triplets, her grandmother and her neighbour who wanted to "tag along to see a new baby"

Do remember that the new mother will look like crap and will not be her normal self. It's not a good time for her to be "on" and meeting new people.

4. Do not bring flowers or balloons to the hospital. Many hospitals have policies against bringing flowers or balloons to the hospital due to allergies.

Do (and I can't stress this enough) BRING FOOD for the new parents. Ask them what they would like to eat in the hospital. Some new moms want a big greasy cheeseburger. While just the thought of a burger would make some moms gag. The new mom may be dying for just a plain bagel and a coffee. Hospital food sucks and I wouldn't even want to feed that crap to my dog. And if the new mom wants a bagel, don't bring a burger into the room for yourself. Remember the gagging? I just told you about that.


5. Don't come into the hospital room smelling like you just took a bath in perfume. (But please do shower before coming over) Again, hospitals frown on perfume due to allergies. The new mom will be very sensitive to smells just like during pregnancy. She may be feeling queasy due to medications and the whole process of childbirth. Yes, I'm bringing up gagging again.


6. Do not complain about anything or start drama. The weather, the temperature in the hospital room, the name that the new parents have given to their child, your own horror birth story, the fact that you were not invited to hold the new baby the second it came out of the mother. Trust me, the new mother doesn't want to hear it.

Do be positive. Tell the mother she did a great job and that the new baby is adorable, wonderful, a miracle and all that fun stuff. That is all you need to say.


7. Do not say "ew what is wrong with the baby's face/ears/eyes/legs" This is not the movies. In real life babies do not come out looking like they are ready for a "cute baby contest" Their skin may have an odd tinge to it due to jaundice or other complications. Most newborns get eye drops put into their eyes. Some babies have baby acne or eczema.

Do say that the baby is beautiful. And that is all. Anything else WILL offend the new parents.


8. Do not ask the new couple if they are now going to get "fixed" and do not ask them when they are having another one. This is definitely not the time to be asking such personal questions. In fact, a family size is never up for discussion. This is also not the time to give your opinion about how the family should be done having children or should have just one more.

Do appreciate the new baby that has come into this world and the fact that you have the honour of visiting.


9. Do not tell the new mother that she should be breastfeeding. Do not tell the new mother that she should be formula feeding. If the new mom is breastfeeding do not tell her that she can't possibly make enough milk to feed the baby or that she is starving the baby. Give her some privacy and do not ogle at her sore engorged breasts. If you are a man or have never breastfed, God help you if you try to give your opinion on why she shouldn't be nursing.

If she is formula feeding do not ask her why she isn't nursing. That is personal.

Do give the new parents privacy while feeding. This goes for breastfeeding and bottle feeding. The first feeding is a time for the new parents to bond with the baby. The new parents do not need your help. If she does need help with feeding she can get help from nurses and lactation consultants. She has been a mother for what, a day? This is a very emotional time for a new mother. She will figure it out on her own and doesn't need anyone to make her feel like a neglectful mom the second the baby is born.


10. Do not use the washroom in the hospital room. That is for the new mothers only. And do not sit on any other unoccupied beds in the hospital room. An unoccupied bed is to be kept clean for the next new mother to lay in.

Do use the visitor washroom down the hall. Wash and sanitize your hands. If you are that tired from standing then most likely you have overstayed your welcome already and should say your goodbyes.


ON ANOTHER NOTE, I am now officially done with classes for the semester and have entered the "waiting game." Seeing how I want this baby out NOW, I figured it would probably be best (for all involved) if I found some projects to work on while I'm waiting for our precious little girl to make her grand entrance.


I'm going to attempt to (hand) sew a seat cushion to go on top of her toy box, a cloth diaper pail liner, a blanket and some cloth diaper liners.


I'm decorating these letters - The large "L" is going to go on the outside of her door, and her initials, "LJB," will go in her room...somewhere.

I'm not very crafty, so it will be interesting to see how things turn out. :)